Ravishing Radishes...

This one is going to be short and sweet, if you're in the mood for long and bitter then I'll warn you now you won't get it here.
Today was a lovely day, I mean TRULY lovely. Blue sky, birds chirping like crazy, blossoms scenting the air with their perfume and long sunny patches of light sliding across the carpet all afternoon.
Sure there was the one moment of screeching when the cat stuck her paw under the screen door and some how, miraculously, poked a lizard enough to make his tail fall off.
(I did the screeching, girlie yes but do you want me to lie?)

Why the lizard was under the door and hanging out within inches of a cat breathing down it's neck through the screen...I dunno.
How long did I look for a tailless lizard to see if he needed medical assistance...I won't say. Assistance, HA! he needed a tail! Which I had.....but I'm sorry.... as much as I'm all for animal health care I can't be doing lizard surgery on a day as nice as today was...I just can't. Even if I had already picked out the right salve to use and a pretty little lizard appropriate bandage and a tiny thimble of whiskey to ease it's pain.....perhaps he didn't run from the cat but from the screeching woman with visions of Do-It-Yourself lizard repair in her eyes.
Shoot, this was going to be short and sweet.
Well maybe it isn't such a lovely day, failed at providing proper medical attention for my little reptilian friend and now I've lied about the length of this post.
*sticks tongue out*
Life carried on after the whole lizard drama in the afternoon. We petted the cat so she wouldn't be emotionally scarred, then abandoned her to run errands around town.
Later we dined on salad with all sorts of good things in it. Radishes, celery, garlic, vegenaise, red onion, cheese, carrot, broccoli, the kitchen sink, sour cream, red wine vinegar, sea salt, black pepper and rice.
It was delicious but my favorite part was the radishes...as you may have already guessed by now...and if you haven't then I bet you're one of those “long and bitter” people I mentioned earlier..hmmmm?
I wonder if there's a world record for longest radish tail...ohhhhh Gawwwd, did I say tail? I think I just had a Freudian moment here.........
Well what else do you call the long skinny part of a radish? A root? Today I'm thinking tail seems appropriate, considering I whacked them off with my knife.......much as the farmer's wife did to the 3 blind mice.....it's a day for physically challenged critters I am beginning to realize.
But these radish tails, they were marvelous, I mean each was a real work of art. I couldn't have improved upon them in any way at all....or could I?
You know how some times your own crafty nature crosses the line into just plain weirdness?
How you find yourself braiding radish tails and thinking it's just about the prettiest thing you ever saw?
You “short and sweet” people understand, I know you do.
If radish braiding becomes a sport or an art form or something I want full credit, my name in lights and a fully equipped medic response team for lizards at my disposal 24 hours a day. Plus I'd also like a shrink for my cat, cause what was she thinking trying to catch a lizard??? For fun or food? Either way it's disturbing.