The Smell of IT!

If you open up our kitchen cabinet you will fairly faint with pleasure. Seriously. Not because I am such a fantastically neat homemaker, that my pantry shelves organization are a thing of beauty, but because of the olfactory experience that awaits us every time we open the door. (I love run on sentences) Sure we might be reaching for innocuous things like olive oil or coconut cream but the nose buffet that awaits our quivering nostrils is a thing of great beauty and mystery. I myself have swooned a time or too from the sheer pleasure of the lovely odors that that greet me when I open the door. (why is odor always associated with a bad smell, why can't it just mean A smell and leave it up to the description to detail whether it's sweet or nasty) I can assure you the aroma that wafts in delicious little clouds from our cabinet is definitely sweet though.
Vin de Noix.
Oh my, I have goosebumps.
The very idea of it coming into existence in my very own cupboard is almost too intense to think about.
Vin de Noix, french for Wine of Nuts.
But how did we happen upon such an unusual thing to have brewing in our cupboard you might ask. And I might look at you with suspicion in my eyes wondering if you're going to try and sneak some of my precious elixir. Of course we haven't tried it yet but anything that smells THAT good has to be qualified as precious elixir.
It started back in June, I was wandering aimlessly about the internet and ran across a blog where a lady was detailing her vin de noix making experiences. Her descriptions were as a siren's call to me. I stared with hypnotic rapt at my computer screen, muttering incomprehensibly, new words that were like bursts of flavor on my tongue.
Green walnuts...ohhhhhhhhhhh..........what's a green walnut and where can I get some I wondered.
As I read more about this magical liqueur one could make at home I was struck with the absolute overpowering need to make some myself. GREEN WALNUTS, where are you I wondered.
Green walnuts turned out to be exactly what they sound like, unripe green walnuts still in the shell and husk.
The thing is though that they are only available at certain times of the year and specifically the last couple of weeks in June. JUNE??? Why it was June now....well not NOW but back then when I was discovering the Vin de Noix and the green walnuts it's made with.
If we were to make Vin de Noix ourselves we had to do it NOW. (again not NOW but the now then, the 3rd week of June) or else we'd have to wait a whole year for green walnuts to be available again.
I think it was kismet I discovered the Vin de Noix at the exact time of the year the main ingredient is available for only a very brief time. It's like the world was saying you HAVE to make this, you HAVE to. I can not argue with the world.
So a quick google search revealed to me a source for green walnuts. A California walnut farm... (are places that grow walnuts called farms? Or can only places that raise things with legs be called farms? Hmmm I'll have to look that up.) Anyways they sold me 5 pounds of green walnuts which they sent by priority mail and before I could so much as blink the nuts were here. (I did in fact blink during the day and a half it took to receive the nuts but I'm just trying to convey the feeling of speed with which they arrived)
Green walnuts are a perishable thing so we had to work fast. Literally 3 days after discovering the existence of Vin de Noix we were whipping up our very own batch of it.
A frenzy of shopping ensued during those days, we needed jars, wine, grain alcohol, maple syrup, cinnamon sticks and oranges. We already had the vanilla bean and cloves and peppercorns. Mmmmm are we drooling yet?
The vin de Noix is made by cutting up the green walnuts, they're huge. Like big fat green golf balls, and when I sliced them open I could see the faint beginnings of the walnut meat and shell.

You have to wear gloves while handling the green walnuts because their juices will stain everything it touches black. You throw the entire thing into the jars. Husk, shell and walnut itself. SEE!!!! How can you not want to make anything that has an entire green walnut??????

The walnut shell has not hardened yet inside the husk so they were fairly easy to chop up. All the yummy spices and flavorings are added in with the green walnuts and the entire thing is drenched in wine.
We couldn't decide which way to go with our Vin De Noix making process. There are many variations on the internet and we settled on 3. One of the bottles got filled with extra sugar and grain alcohol and extra green walnuts to make a liqueur instead of a wine. The rest of the bottles we filled with either white or red wine.

(Don't the bottles look like something out of a mad scientist's laboratory?)

Then you let the entire thing sit for 2 months...I know..I know...I have never had any Vin de Noix and am basing this entire experiment on the glowing descriptions and reviews of homemade Vin De Noix we read on the internet. And now I am telling you we have to wait 2 whole months......take a breath people. I know you're on the edge of your seats BUT.....it's not ready in 2 months either. In 2 months we are supposed to strain it and pour the Vin de Noix into bottles we can stop up with corks. Then we are supposed to wait 2 more months before it's *ready*.
AGGGGGGGGGHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. The torture, the torture. I am not a patient person. I don't chew my nails or anything like that but I have half a mind to start just so I can make it through these 4 months total. It's like making a cake and being told it would be best if you waited 4 months before trying it. The horror...though come to think of it fruitcake is like that. And I can personally vouch for the fact that fruitcake kicks ass if you give it time to mellow in all it's rum soaked glory for a few months before eating it up in a fruitcake inspired madness..........
So now here I sit, shooting quick glances at the innocent cupboard door behind which, sitting quietly in the dark, is the most delicious thing I have ever smelled. Well ok I dunno there's some pretty damn good smellin stuff out there but this is right up there with it.
The *raw* Vin de Noix as I like to think of it right now is slowly metamorphosing in to a thing of gastronomic delight. Not only am I witnessing this through the sweet nutty scent every time I peek but in the colour. The nuts are turning the wines black.
HOW CAN YOU NOT WANT TO DRINK SOMETHING THAT'S PITCH BLACK AND NOT THROUGH ARTIFICIAL MEANS PEOPLE???? You can't not try something like that!
We couldn't help but notice that the Vin de Noix is supposed to be ready around the same time as Alan's birthday. Ohhhhhh, I know what we'll be having for a treat on his special day this year!
Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
For now we satisfy ourselves by continuously opening that particular cupboard door....what? I'm telling you I HAVE to get the olive oil out of there at least 5 times a day. And Alan needs to get the coconut cream and cans of tuna and take them for little walks around the kitchen so he can have the pleasure of putting them back.
Oh yeah, it smells that good. Don't you wish you had my nose right now?